The Wedding Vows | Golden tips for writing

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wedding vow

The Wedding Vows

There is nothing better than giving a unique and self-written gift. So how do you write a wedding vow? In this blog post, read more about vows + 6 tips that will help you write a successful vow for your partner.

Questions to answer

Below are points you can use to write your wedding vows:

  1. How did you fall in love?
  2. At what moments do you feel yourself loved?
  3. What makes your relationship special?
  4. What do you have in common?
  5. What do you enjoy doing most together?
  6. How does he or she enrich your life?
  7. Where do you differ?
  8. What bothers you about your partner? (Think impatience, snoring or hanging toilet roll the other way round)
  9. What is typical of you?
  10. How have you changed?
  11. What are fun commemorative memories?
  12. Have there been any tough moments that you have overcome?
  13. Why did you stay with him or her?
  14. What does love mean to you?
  15. Where do you want to go?
vow emotion

How do you write a wedding vow?

Writing a wedding vow is easier said than done. How do you write a wedding vow, is using rhyme essential and what topics do you focus on? Here are 5 tips to support you while writing.

1. Follow your gut

Writing a successful wedding vow has only one real rule: write from your gut. After all, you write best from your feelings. Your head knows what you like about your partner, but you experience love with your feelings. Listen to your heart and it will automatically be on paper.

love poem during vows

2. Make it personal

One of the most important components of successful wedding vows is originality. Print out one from the internet, read it up, and automatically notice that this will do nothing for your partner. It is therefore important to name things that your partner recognises, touches and experiences. Therefore, first write down what you like and like about your partner. You can process this later.
When writing a personal wedding vow, it is also important to write down why you like the person, rather than that you like the person.
'I like seeing you because you are so much fun,' are empty words. 'You are fun because I can be my boorish self with you' or 'Even in the hard times, you were there to show me the way. For that, I am always grateful to you." are instead words with meaning.

3. Keep it real

Using hyperbole can work well, but wedding vows that are too tacky and therefore unreal can backfire. Therefore, keep your wedding vows loving, simple, but above all pure. So don't write about how your partner always cooks, is cheerful and likes to do laundry, if this is not the case. Rather, write lovingly about how you handle difficult situations and the trust you have in the other person.

vow writing

4. Rhyme is unimportant

However, wedding vows do not necessarily have to rhyme. In fact, making it rhyme can sometimes be detrimental and break down the splendour of the piece. If you focus too much on rhyming words, you run the risk of using too many sentences without an opinion, purely to have that sentence end with a rhyming word. Think of:

'You are my dearest Jan,

 

Who can do all the jobs,

 

Like repairing a roof tile,

 

You are my great carpenter.

 

It sounds heartfelt, but profound is different. For that reason, it is sometimes useful to let go of rhyming altogether at first. Who knows, some sentences might rhyme by themselves, or you might just end your wedding vows with a rhyming word. This is all fine. It makes your wedding vow more beautiful, cleaner and original.

vow during ceremony

5. Use humour

Wedding vows need not only be serious. We have imposed on ourselves the rule that sincere poetry must be serious. Humour has the power to convey a message in a light-hearted way. Whereas serious wedding vows can come across as uncomfortable, humour ensures that the message comes across in a fresh way. Commonly used humour in love poems is the classic 'sexy-humour.' This may sound obscene or crude, but it need not be. After all, poetry that makes fun of desires is ancient. Note: Humour is personal. Therefore, estimate for yourself what your partner appreciates and what you can and cannot include in wedding vows.

Poem during the photo shoot

6. Practice your wedding vows out loud

If you plan to recite your wedding vow, practise it beforehand. This will help you find out whether it sounds right when you pronounce it, and it will prevent you from stumbling over words later. Match the text in the vow book to by improving each time.

Gay marriage

When do you read wedding vows?

You can recite a vow during the ceremony. You can also do it during the photo shoot so you have a moment to yourselves. However, the photographer will want to photograph your reactions from a distance.

Bridal couple giving each other an embrace

The marriage vow for men and women

There are no rules attached to writing a wedding vow addressed to men or women. After all, no two men or women like the same thing. Where one woman is sensitive, another man is down-to-earth and vice versa. Therefore, match the style of your wedding vows to your partner's personality.
If your wife is a down-to-earth person, keep it simple and sweet. If your husband is a fan of drama in films and literature, a more dramatic, profound poem will be more appropriate. Follow your gut in this.

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About the Author: Justin Manders

Thanks for reading this article! Above all, let me know what you want to see. You can see my entire portfolio view. In my opinion, I have the most fun profession in the world. Together with Nathalie, I have been photographing for just over seven years now and I have learned the most by getting to know many people. I think the camera is just a tool and it is the people who make the photo.
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2 Comments

  1. [...] Previous 30 original wedding day gifts [...]

  2. Suzan 6 February 2022 at 18:27 - Reply

    So beautiful.

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